Sunday morning prayer

I FEEL LIKE PRAYING THIS MORNING! WILL YOU JOIN ME?...

Good morning Lord.
Thank you for allowing me to see this Sunday morning. There were so many who closed their eyes last night and did not wake to see this morning's sunshine. Obviously, you are not through with me yet. So since I have the ability to inhale and exhale, allow me to thank you for EVERY gift that you have given me.

Thank you for my mind that allows me to think on your goodness even though the situations that I face everyday are strong enough to take me under..... they don't. I'M STILL HERE!!! I am grateful that you trust me enough to send things my way that are designed to help me grow and mature. I thank you for the people whom you've placed in my pathway, because they allow me to see areas in my life where I need to grow.

I thank you God for loving me, even though I'm seemingly unlovable at times. ( that mean word I spoke, my attitude, the rolling of my eyes...I'm just sayin') You still think that I am pretty special God and that makes my heart smile. Help me to live up to your expectations of me. You desire me to be blessed, to be whole, to be restored, to be renewed, to be a blessing. It's good to know that it "is the Father's good pleasure to give ME the kingdom".

I am so humbled in your presence Dear God. Allow my steps to be ordered by you today. Allow the words that I speak bring life to someone. Allow the hug that I give uplift someone's spirit. Allow my words of encouragement to keep someone from giving up on life today. Even as I pray this prayer, someone has already prayed that you would give them a sign that you still love them.

...Oooo pick me, pick me God to show up on your behalf.

When I walk into the room and open my mouth to speak allow your words to roll off of my tongue, so they see YOU and not me. I'm just your vessel.

So I praise you, I thank you, I honor you, I bless you, I extol you, I worship you....

Today is blessed and I'm determined to be a blessing today.
In Jesus name I pray.......AMEN

Now walk it out... and change the world...one kind word, one nod of the head, one hug, one smile at a time.

Blessings & Smooches

MARK YOUR TERRITORY in 2016 !!!

     Last month, we had a major ice storm in Oklahoma City.  Power lines snapped under the weight of the ice.   Trees that had been there for years were now split into two.  It was strange that we would get that type of weather so early in the winter.  This usually doesn't happen until January or February.  The weather personalities from Al Roker to our local reporters in the City have been talking about "El Nino" causing such extraordinary weather patterns across the globe.  Anyway soon after the thaw, Arby and I decided to venture out for a walk.  He sniffed every tree, bush and seemingly every patch of grass along the way. During some of our walks together, it seemed as if his head never left the ground because he was so busy sniffing.  (Come on boy, let's walk already. Good grief!)

     One evening, I waited really late to walk him.  It was already dark outside, so instead of walking our normal path, we chose a shorter path that was in ear shot of our house.  I noticed that there were piles of leaves along our path and wouldn't you know it.....Arby sniffed every pile.  He'd sniff and prance away, sniff and prance away.  This was the pattern for most of the walk.  Since we had chosen a shorter route, I decided to do several laps so we could still make it a full mile.  Sniff and prance, sniff and prance..... WAIT!  He actually lingered over one particular pile of leaves.  Eventually we moved on.....1st lap done.  On the second lap, we approached this same pile of leaves and he kicked his leg up in the air, and urinated on the top of the pile.  Third lap....he kicked that leg up again and did the same thing.  I started to laugh and realized that he was marking his territory.

     What caused him to do this? I did some reading and it mentioned that you can tell a lot about a dog through their urine odor.  It's not necessarily meant for humans to decipher, but it is definitely something that other 4-legged creatures understand.  When a dog wants to appear large and in charge, it will leave his/her scent for the next dog by leaning to the side, kicking the leg high and then urinating.  The higher up the scent is on the tree or pole, the larger the dog appears to the next approaching animal.  Interesting!!!

    What was particularly fascinating to me was the next evening, we went out again after dark and chose the identical path as the previous night.  Sniff and prance, sniff and prance....WAIT!  We reached the same pile of leaves and YES............Arby kicked his leg up and marked the territory again.  It was at this time that I realized that God was talking to me and I want to share it with you.

     There have been things in our life that we've all had to experience.  Some great joys, some great sorrows, health scares, marital strife, overbearing parents, disobedient children, disloyal friends, ungrateful employers, divorce, death or financial difficulty.  Hopefully, you have not had to deal with all of these things at the same time, but I can almost guarantee that you've experienced at least 2 of these.  Arby's "pissing contest" (pardon me...)  gave me insight into how to deal with some of these issues.

It's time to mark your territory!

     As we enter 2016, it's time to speak up for yourself and let everyone know that you mean business.  It's time to mark the territory and tell the enemy that the little tricks and distractions that have been used against you before, CANNOT and WILL NOT work this time!!!  It's time for battle, not physically, but spiritually and emotionally.

     Perhaps you've been dealing with sickness in your body....mark your territory with Exodus 23:25 that says, Worship the LORD your God, and his blessing will be on your food and water. I will take away sickness from among you".

     Perhaps you've been dealing with mental instability...mark your territory with 2 Timothy 1:7 which states, "For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind."

     Heartbreak?...Mark your territory with Psalms 147:3, " He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds."


     Financial problems?... Mark your territory with Philippians 4:19, "And my God will supply all your needs according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus."

     Dealing with difficult people?... Mark your territory with the thought that "People can not love, support or believe in you beyond their capacity."  Keep loving them, but love from afar.

     Dealing with patience?...Mark your territory with Isaiah 40:31, "But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint."  But you must also learn to worship and work, as you wait.

     Issue with forgiving yourself for your past?...  Mark your territory with Isaiah 43:18-19, “Do not remember the former things, nor consider the things of old.  Behold, I will do a new thing, now it shall spring forth; Shall you not know it?  I will even make a road in the wilderness and rivers in the desert. Let that thing go Baby!

     The bottom line is this...God has so much in store for you and it is His good pleasure to give you the kingdom.  However, God is not forceful!  If you don't invite Him into your situation, He'll stand back and watch you make a mess out of it.  His desire is that you would find that pole and just pee already.  Mark your spot!  Make your claim!  Establish your territory! Claim your domain!  Invite God in and keep the enemy out.  (Out of your mind, out of your body, out of your circumstance, out of your family, out of your bank account....OUT, OUT, OUT)

     2016 can be a year of promise and fulfillment.  It can be a year of making dreams come true and not just daydreaming.  Let 2016 be the year that you move closer with more boldness and determination towards your destiny.  It can and it will, if you mark your territory today!

Now walk it out..........go find the nearest pole, tree or pile of leaves and pee....Mark your territory!!! 

Blessed New Year !!!

      

Babe, I truly honor your role as their father!

Sometimes I think that I'm the bomb.com when it comes to mothering.  I can be funny, stern, engaging, hilarious, loving and so much more all while doing laundry, cleaning the house, preparing meals and working outside the home. On more than one occasion, I must admit, I have looked at my husband and thought, "I could do this without you".  Oh come on Ladies, don't get self-righteous on me.  If you're married and have children,  I'm sure there have been times that you looked at the amount of work that you do around the house and compare it to what he does.  Many times it seems that you are working your butt off and he is chilling. But today I have a totally different perspective of his amazing role in the lives of our 2 boys.

Last Wednesday, our 15-year old son had ACL surgery. (SPORTS!!!) On Thursday morning, my husband had to fly out of town for a few days.  I didn't mind it though because it gave me an opportunity to do what I love to do and that is  'mother'.  For 2 full days I had his meds timed, transported his CPM machine between the living room and his bedroom, made sure he was eating, held on to the back of his shirt as he maneuvered on the crutches to the restroom, rubbed his face and just loved on him. (Thanks to all our family and friends who picked up the younger son, carried him back and forth to school and kept him entertained. And thanks to those who came and sat with us or brought us food.  It meant so much!)

My husband flew back in town yesterday and all of a sudden I noticed a shift in Chandler's attitude.  He was a little more talkative.  He got up on the crutches and moved around a little more independently.  At the end of the night, he wanted to get on the CPM machine for one more hour, so I set it up in the bed.  While I was in the shower, I heard my husband moving around... Chandler was ready to go to sleep and he helped take him off the machine.  I was shocked....someone took my job. (I almost didn't know what to do.) This morning I woke up to the sound of crutches in the bathroom (or so I thought).  I jumped up, put my robe on, scurried around to make sure that I moved the rug off the bathroom floor so he wouldn't trip.  Well wasn't I surprised when I looked in the bathroom and he wasn't there?  He was lying in the bed, under the covers.  He was just smiling from ear to ear, when I asked had he just been walking.  He said, "yeah Mom I had to use the restroom".  Had I slept through him calling my name or did I miss the beep of the phone signaling that I had a text message?(That's how we communicated, instead of ringing a bell.)  I just stood there bewildered and said, "oh good for you Babe".  When I asked if  he was healed, all of a sudden since Daddy had come back in town, he said "I'm progressing Mom".  Oh okay then, still dazed.  Then he said, "oh and guess what Mom...Dad took me off the machine last night and I'm ready to get back on it now".

Once I left him in the room to go prepare breakfast, it made me think.  Dad was able to pull something out of him that I was unable to.  When he needed to be doctored, mothered and babied... I was the one.  But there came a time that he decided that he wanted to try some things on his own, he felt the confidence of his Daddy in the room which gave him more confidence to get up and move.  WOW!  I wasn't offended, but it made me appreciate how the presence of my husband actually affects the boys.  Dad didn't have to say anything special, he was just there!  Even after sending my husband off to church this morning, he is walking around the house on the crutches, has washed up for the day, put on clean clothes and has even begun to do some homework. (HW only after my strong persuasion, of course.)  He's regaining his confidence and smiling the entire time as he moves about.

Let me encourage you...

If you're a father, whether you're in the home or not of your children, please recognize that what you bring to the table is vital for your children's self-assuredness, growth and development.

If you're a mother and not with the child's father, please find a positive male role-model, coach, teacher, etc... for your son or daughter. They need to see life through a different lens and from another perspective.

Now I still might squawk a little bit when the tasks around the house become burdensome.  But then again, I might just sit back, get a glass of wine and allow my husband to do it.  He may do it slower, on his own schedule, and not the way I would do it...but I must honor his efforts and respect his role in our home.  Although it's December, I must say thank you and Happy Father's day to my husband.  Your presence means the world to ALL of us in this home.  Thank you for giving me 2 beautiful sons who will grow up to be strong African-American leaders and lovers of God.  Years from now when a reporter shoves a microphone in their face, after they've accomplished some wonderful feat, not only will they say" thanks Mom", but they can say "I'd like to thank both my Mom and Dad". (I just know they better say my name 1st.  I'm just saying....you know who the boss really is.)

Life is a journey and I really like the people on my immediate path.  My hope is that you will be able to experience the same joys.   Even if your family is set up differently from mine, you can still create an environment with people whom you love and trust, so that your children will appreciate every viewpoint that life has to offer. They will be better because of it.

Now walk it out...

My Dudes!

SCREAM!

Does your life seem like an open book?  I know mine surely does.

Sometimes I feel like God allows me to have specific life experiences, both good and bad, to "grow me up".  I also believe that many of these experiences aren't even about me, but God wants to bless someone else through my story.  If this is the case, then why am I so quick to hold onto my truth, in hopes to shield it from the opinion of others? 

The catch is we all must steady ourselves not to focus on others, but rather to focus on what God is trying to say to us and accomplish through us.  When you begin to think this way, it is easier to let go of the pride that would banish us to silence.  Our honesty could allow us to ask for help when needed. Then once we receive that help, it becomes our responsibility to share that with someone else.  I believe that many times we stay stuck in the pit way too long and it's simply because we refuse to scream out for help.  There are individuals specifically assigned to come to your aid, but they can't find you because you are allowing your mouth to remain closed.

I encourage you to be honest with yourself, open up your mouth, SCREAM for help, receive the ministry that is given and share it with others so they too may be blessed.

Remember what you are experiencing now may not be about you.  God ultimately wants to get the glory out of your life.

Now walk it out...

I hadn't realized the leaves had changed until the tree had fallen

Last week, we celebrated Thanksgiving.  My husband and I cooked for more than 20 people and had an amazing time entertaining guests the entire weekend.  The only downfall to the holiday weekend was that we were hit with torrential downpours and eventually an ice storm.  We were lying in bed on Saturday morning and heard a sudden crash...it was the sound of the tree outside our bedroom  window splitting and falling to the ground.  (Thank God, it didn't damage the house.)

Throughout the day, we heard the crackling of tree limbs and watched, cautiously, as the wires crossing our backyard began to droop under the weight of the ice accumulation.  Thousands of people across the city, lost electrical power and trees lost limbs as the freezing rain continued to fall.  It wasn't until Sunday morning as I drove to church and again this morning as I walked Arby, that I noticed the leaves on the trees had already changed.  The leaves were so brilliantly colored.  Shades of ruby, violet, chartreuse, cocoa, cherry, turquoise and hazel all intermingled on the ground.  They were so beautiful!  The colors were so intense and immediately I felt a tinge of disappointment.  I wasn't disappointed because the limbs had fallen, but my heart sank because I realized that I had missed the changing of the season.  

Everyday I drive or walk along the same street lined by massive trees and I hadn't noticed the leaves had changed their hue.  It immediately made me stop to think what else I had been missing.  What things had I skimmed over because I was moving too quickly?  What cues had I missed to signal that I was embarking upon another season?   What cues have you missed?

Are you traveling along the same streets and missing the signs?  Are you going through life without recognizing the tiny joys and the beautiful shades that cover your personal landscape?  Are you so busy trying to get down the street of life that you have completely missed the trees and shrubs that line your path?  

• The laughter of your children?
• The hug of a friend?
• The smile of a stranger?
• The touch of your lover?
• The note of encouragement?
• The unexpected phone call? 

Have you missed it all?

Think about it!  Why are we constantly rushing through life, trying to reach our academic, financial and social goals; but missing the tiny details and crucial life experiences that were sent to make us recognize the beauty of God?  It's not too late to make a change!  You don't want to wait until a storm comes and the tree splits before you realize how beautiful it really was.

Be thankful for the few friends who are consistent in your life.....let them know that you appreciate them.

Be gracious and helpful to the senior citizen whom you see struggling to walk down the aisle...offer a cart or maybe your arm to help steady them.

Be mindful when you spend time with your children...recognize that 5 minutes of your undivided attention means a lifetime of your child knowing that you care.

Be present when your lover touches the small of your back....it might not be about intercourse but rather the touch symbolizes a form of intimacy and connection.

Be open to wisdom of others....they might save you a world of bad decisions.

Take time to notice every pigment and shade: brown or toffee-colored; green or mint; orange or apricot; red or cerise; yellow or lemon; blue or ultramarine.  Each color is vibrant and original and carries with it its own story.  Don't miss the message.  Don't miss the opportunity.  Don't miss the joy.  Relish every interaction.  Recognize each opportunity to grow.  There's still enough time to recognize the pulchritude of the leaves before the tree actually falls.

Now walk it out.............. and notice the leaves.

You are NOT your situation! You're so much more!

A few weeks ago, Courtland jammed his middle finger playing basketball and then injured it again the following week.  RICE... rest-ice-compression-elevation was our prescription once the x-ray determined that it was not broken.  I purchased a finger splint for him just to make him feel a little more comfortable and to prevent re-injury.

I noticed that he had begun wearing the splint and it was becoming a crutch.  If he would take it off around the house for a moment, he would go into a conniption if he couldn't find it before going out.  The whole scene was beginning to get old!  On Monday afternoon, I was picking him up from school and found him in one of the rooms finishing his homework.  I sat there with him as he finished and watched as he pulled the splint off and on.  He noticed that the splint had begun to smell after wearing it for so long.  I suggested that he take it off and begin squeezing a tennis ball to work on his flexibility. (We were still using ibuprofen for the residual swelling.)  He looked at me strangely and with doubt in his eyes; but the more I talked about the benefits of moving his finger he was willing to let the splint go.  That was Monday and this is Friday and he has not looked back since.  It made me think how he had begun to rely on the finger splint because he really thought that he still needed it.  The splint, however, no longer served any purpose (except by being a germ incubator).

That moment made me think about how easily we fall into the trap of living out of our hurt and pain.  We collect the titles of illness, misfortune and heartbreak and wear them like a badge.  We adapt our lives to accommodate the splint that we've grown accustomed to, without realizing that it is beginning to smell foul and is affecting those around us.

Think about it....

• You lost your job and now you feel inadequate which causes you to lash out at others.
• Your relationship ended and you immediately found someone else to take your mind off the hurt, not realizing that you are not giving them the full YOU because you don't know who that really is.
• You received the diagnosis and immediately started coughing, hanging your head and dragging your feet because of what the report said, Not because you actually felt sick.

So many times we act out of habit and societal norms.  If something sad happens, then surely we are to be sad.  If something hurts us then somehow we are now justified to take it out on those around us.  If we receive a disturbing phone call, it somehow should affect the rest of the day.

But what would happen if we actually began to act the opposite of what is normally expected?  What would happen if instead of jumping from one relationship to another, we'd actually take time to love ourselves first?  What would happen if after we received the report, we'd begin to thank God for our healing? What would happen if after losing our job, we'd actually work on rebuilding our resume and maybe enroll in school for another degree?

Sometimes it's easy to pick up the negative labels, but I challenge you to trample the label under your feet and stand tall.  You are NOT your situation!  You don't have to wear the label and badge of disappointment because God has created you for more.  Put on Deuteronomy 28:13 that reminds us that "you are the head and not the tail'.  Speak life over your situation and begin to "call things that are not as though they were".

I am Peace.
I am Joy.
I am the embodiment of Christ.
I am  fearfully and wonderfully made.
I am unique.
I am blessed.

Now recognize that you are not what you're going through...... be willing to change the label and
walk it out............!

You can't eat table food, if you're developmentally only ready for breast milk

I must share a bit of what I shared with a woman's group earlier today....a group in which I once held an officer position.  It's a testimony about moving when God says move, rather than participating in something because you've always done it. It's a testimony about how God still shows His mercy and allows a window to close on you, even when you refuse to close it yourself.  I've written about dancing in the hallway before and I've mentioned about faith in God when I left my job this summer.  This testimony is about my being transparent...honest with God, myself and others as God is building my faith muscles.

Here is a portion of the letter of encouragement that I shared with my Sister-friends. Please make sure there is a purpose for everything that you do!

Dear  _____________

If you have ever read my book or consistently follow my blog posts, then you know that I am literally an open book and tell all of my business. LOL. God allows me to use everyday situations, some sane and others totally crazy to minister to me and ultimately to others.  Whether I’m walking the dog, interacting with my family, gazing up into the sky or lying in the bed thinking, God talks to me and shows me another side of myself as I ascertain the different aspects of His love.

So why, when addressing my Sisters, would God to talk to me in any other way?  Prayerfully my transparency will minister to you and allow you to see another side of yourself and a different perspective of God’s love.

Back in March, God spoke to me and told me that it was time to leave my job.  WHAT??!!!  Are you crazy?  Honestly, things were becoming slightly uncomfortable for me in the office, and I didn’t realize that this was God’s way of slowly moving me out of that position.  (He knew that I was in so deep and so comfortable that I could have stayed there for many more years… just wasting time.) I was still going to teach my classes for two separate departments, but the part time office position that afforded me “play money” and the bulk of the boys’ tuition was going to be gone.  I’ve trusted God before and I knew from past experience that He would provide. (He ALWAYS does.) At the end of May, I said goodbye to a job that had been my home for the past 7 or 8 years because I believed and still do believe that God has created me for more.

It’s amazing though because as I was making physical moves, God was touching my heart and shifting my mindset.  My downfall was… I began to search things out on my own in attempt to make up that ‘money’ difference, but every door remained shut.  I had shut the door on one thing and expected God to move me quickly through the next door…but the next door was closed as well.

Me: Lord I know you didn’t bring me out in the hallway to leave me here.  I did what I thought you wanted me to do and I’m still in the hallway.  Pay my tithes and continue to be faithful, but I’m still in the hallway. Continue to be a light and encouragement to others, but I’m still in the hallway.  Crossed all my T’s and dotted all of the I’s, but I’m still in the hallway.

God:  Baby-girl, I guess you better figure it out until the next-door opens then.  In fact, I can’t even open the door because you’re not ready to walk through it.  There are some things that I need to teach you in the hallway.  There are some lessons that you need to learn in the hallway.  There are some old habits that you need to break in the hallway.  There’s quiet time that I’d like to spend with you in the hallway.  So the hallway can be a place of annoyance for you or a place of acceptance.  The hallway can be a place of pain or of peace; a place of complaining or a place of constant communication with me; a place of refusal or a place of refuge; a place of hurt or a sanctuary of healing.  It’s up to you Girl, what you decide to do while you’re here in the hallway.  The length of time that you’re in the hallway depends on how you react to the challenges that I place before you.  I don’t need your skill set to move you forward, all I want is your surrender.

Me: Okay God, I get it now.  So I guess I better learn how to dance. Excuse me while I go get my cutest high-heeled shoes because I’m ready to praise you and dance right here in this hallway. (Lawd knows, I love a cute heel.)

So that’s what I’ve been doing Ladies, I’ve been dancing in the hallway! And God has been revealing Himself to me.  I’ve been saying yes to some things and slowly walking away from others.  I’ve been cutting the fat and feasting off of the lean meat. (And we all know the fatty part of the steak is what gives it flavor.)  Honestly I have been fighting it since May, but I am learning to surrender my will to His.  I had saved my money to pay my dues and every time I was going to pay it, I needed it for something else.  So I’d put my coins to the side again, only to have to use it for something more pressing.  I thought I had to save face and just be a part of the organization because that was expected of me, but God quietly whispered, “Is this how you want to treat me in the hallway?”  And yes, I kept fighting back.  I hadn’t been able to do it myself, but God pulled the trigger by letting the bylaws of the organization end my participation.  Time finally expired for me to pay, but the next morning I was so relieved!  (I know that sounds crazy, but it is so true.) It’s just a part of my hallway experience!

I am not sad. I am not frustrated. I am not bemoaning my decision. (Pardon me, His will for me.)  I am learning to listen. I am building my faith muscles.  I am trusting God more and not relying on my connections.  I am preparing my heart and mind, as God is custom designing what’s on the other side of the door for me.  Correction…He already has what He wants for me on the other side of the door…. He’s just been waiting for me to grow up so I can handle what is through the next opening.  (There is nothing worse than giving a baby table food when he/she is still only able to digest breast milk.)  Let the church say….Amen!

So there it is Ladies, that’s my story and my hallway experience.  Too much information?!...too bad that’s just me.  I don’t know whom that was for, but I felt lead to share it with you.  As you are moving, working, growing and raising families, remember to keep your ear in tune to God’s voice.  God has created you to be a blessing to the people who have been placed in your path and there are some things that will only be accomplished if you decide to step up and do your part.  So live my Sister and if you ever find yourself between two doors and can’t find your way out, I challenge you to make the decision to dance in the hallway.  Drink the milk now and grow strong healthy teeth so God can prepare a feast before you and you're ready to take a bite!

Now walk it out...