You can't eat table food, if you're developmentally only ready for breast milk

I must share a bit of what I shared with a woman's group earlier today....a group in which I once held an officer position.  It's a testimony about moving when God says move, rather than participating in something because you've always done it. It's a testimony about how God still shows His mercy and allows a window to close on you, even when you refuse to close it yourself.  I've written about dancing in the hallway before and I've mentioned about faith in God when I left my job this summer.  This testimony is about my being transparent...honest with God, myself and others as God is building my faith muscles.

Here is a portion of the letter of encouragement that I shared with my Sister-friends. Please make sure there is a purpose for everything that you do!

Dear  _____________

If you have ever read my book or consistently follow my blog posts, then you know that I am literally an open book and tell all of my business. LOL. God allows me to use everyday situations, some sane and others totally crazy to minister to me and ultimately to others.  Whether I’m walking the dog, interacting with my family, gazing up into the sky or lying in the bed thinking, God talks to me and shows me another side of myself as I ascertain the different aspects of His love.

So why, when addressing my Sisters, would God to talk to me in any other way?  Prayerfully my transparency will minister to you and allow you to see another side of yourself and a different perspective of God’s love.

Back in March, God spoke to me and told me that it was time to leave my job.  WHAT??!!!  Are you crazy?  Honestly, things were becoming slightly uncomfortable for me in the office, and I didn’t realize that this was God’s way of slowly moving me out of that position.  (He knew that I was in so deep and so comfortable that I could have stayed there for many more years… just wasting time.) I was still going to teach my classes for two separate departments, but the part time office position that afforded me “play money” and the bulk of the boys’ tuition was going to be gone.  I’ve trusted God before and I knew from past experience that He would provide. (He ALWAYS does.) At the end of May, I said goodbye to a job that had been my home for the past 7 or 8 years because I believed and still do believe that God has created me for more.

It’s amazing though because as I was making physical moves, God was touching my heart and shifting my mindset.  My downfall was… I began to search things out on my own in attempt to make up that ‘money’ difference, but every door remained shut.  I had shut the door on one thing and expected God to move me quickly through the next door…but the next door was closed as well.

Me: Lord I know you didn’t bring me out in the hallway to leave me here.  I did what I thought you wanted me to do and I’m still in the hallway.  Pay my tithes and continue to be faithful, but I’m still in the hallway. Continue to be a light and encouragement to others, but I’m still in the hallway.  Crossed all my T’s and dotted all of the I’s, but I’m still in the hallway.

God:  Baby-girl, I guess you better figure it out until the next-door opens then.  In fact, I can’t even open the door because you’re not ready to walk through it.  There are some things that I need to teach you in the hallway.  There are some lessons that you need to learn in the hallway.  There are some old habits that you need to break in the hallway.  There’s quiet time that I’d like to spend with you in the hallway.  So the hallway can be a place of annoyance for you or a place of acceptance.  The hallway can be a place of pain or of peace; a place of complaining or a place of constant communication with me; a place of refusal or a place of refuge; a place of hurt or a sanctuary of healing.  It’s up to you Girl, what you decide to do while you’re here in the hallway.  The length of time that you’re in the hallway depends on how you react to the challenges that I place before you.  I don’t need your skill set to move you forward, all I want is your surrender.

Me: Okay God, I get it now.  So I guess I better learn how to dance. Excuse me while I go get my cutest high-heeled shoes because I’m ready to praise you and dance right here in this hallway. (Lawd knows, I love a cute heel.)

So that’s what I’ve been doing Ladies, I’ve been dancing in the hallway! And God has been revealing Himself to me.  I’ve been saying yes to some things and slowly walking away from others.  I’ve been cutting the fat and feasting off of the lean meat. (And we all know the fatty part of the steak is what gives it flavor.)  Honestly I have been fighting it since May, but I am learning to surrender my will to His.  I had saved my money to pay my dues and every time I was going to pay it, I needed it for something else.  So I’d put my coins to the side again, only to have to use it for something more pressing.  I thought I had to save face and just be a part of the organization because that was expected of me, but God quietly whispered, “Is this how you want to treat me in the hallway?”  And yes, I kept fighting back.  I hadn’t been able to do it myself, but God pulled the trigger by letting the bylaws of the organization end my participation.  Time finally expired for me to pay, but the next morning I was so relieved!  (I know that sounds crazy, but it is so true.) It’s just a part of my hallway experience!

I am not sad. I am not frustrated. I am not bemoaning my decision. (Pardon me, His will for me.)  I am learning to listen. I am building my faith muscles.  I am trusting God more and not relying on my connections.  I am preparing my heart and mind, as God is custom designing what’s on the other side of the door for me.  Correction…He already has what He wants for me on the other side of the door…. He’s just been waiting for me to grow up so I can handle what is through the next opening.  (There is nothing worse than giving a baby table food when he/she is still only able to digest breast milk.)  Let the church say….Amen!

So there it is Ladies, that’s my story and my hallway experience.  Too much information?!...too bad that’s just me.  I don’t know whom that was for, but I felt lead to share it with you.  As you are moving, working, growing and raising families, remember to keep your ear in tune to God’s voice.  God has created you to be a blessing to the people who have been placed in your path and there are some things that will only be accomplished if you decide to step up and do your part.  So live my Sister and if you ever find yourself between two doors and can’t find your way out, I challenge you to make the decision to dance in the hallway.  Drink the milk now and grow strong healthy teeth so God can prepare a feast before you and you're ready to take a bite!

Now walk it out...