Sun and shadow

Have you stopped recently to appreciate God's wonderment? Last week,  I was sitting on one of the campus benches, waiting on a colleague. It was a beautiful day...the sun was shining, yet it was cool enough for a light jacket. I stayed on the bench about 5 minutes when suddenly I became aware of God's presence.

I began to get warm, yet I had to pull my jacket a little tighter because the cool air was seeping in. The longer I sat, the more I became aware of the awesomeness of God. I closed my eyes to realize that the left side of my face was actually hot and the right side of my face was cold. How amazing!

It was wonderful that I could experience balance within the natural elements and experience God's grace of sun & shadow, but I was more excited that I was AWARE of it all. At that time, I was actually living in the moment and truly appreciating it.

How many times have we missed God's wonderment because we were busy or moving too quickly? I know I do...quite often!!! It's times like that when I realize that God wants to commune with me in the stillness. He's not impressed by my running around looking busy and important. He simply wants 5 minutes of my day to pause, ponder and pray!

Take time to notice God's wonders today and walk in balance!

Take yourself seriously

Others will begin to take you seriously, only after you begin to take yourself seriously!  Don't be afraid to champion the gifts and the talents that lie within you.  Be careful not to make yourself small to make others more comfortable.  God has given you innate abilities that not only empower you, but that can change the trajectory of the people around you.
So walk in your power, walk in your greatness, walk in your God-given gifting and walk with humility. 

Posture of Prayer

This morning I awakened around 2 am, unable to sleep.  Rather than toss and turn and disturb my husband, I got up and began washing and folding clothes.  Our sons are away with their grandparents, so I used my youngest sons room to get my work accomplished.  While I was in the room, I began cleaning and purging the clutter that has been slowly overtaking his room.  It was a peaceful time for me, just to be alone with my thoughts.   In fact, my spirit  had been craving  this quiet space for some time now.  I turned on the television to watch a few episodes of Super Soul Sunday that I had recorded. (I love the DVR because I can playback a show without all of the commercials.)  The first show I watched talked about living with intention and not doing things just because you think that  is what you should do; but rather being purposeful in your decisions.  They also mentioned that when the little you (your persona) connects with the big You (the Spirit within you), how powerful you actually become. What great lessons to learn!

However my liberation came during the 2^nd episode. Oprah mentioned to her guest how powerful it was to know that a total stranger had prayed for her during her trial,  many years ago.  She was almost overcome, as she recollected the story.

It was at that moment that the floodgates opened for me. I realized that it was no stranger that had prayed for me; but rather I had my own angel for almost 42 years, who prayed for me and over me.  I can still hear her moaning in the Spirit as she would pray for the family, her friends, the community and people all across this nation.  Even after I became an adult and moved away, I could call her anytime of day and she would just start praying.

All I could do was sob, curl up in a ball on the bed and listen to the moans emanating from my own belly.  I was so thankful that God thought enough of me to have a mother that could go to God on my behalf.  Those thankful tears, quickly turned to tears of hunger.  Hunger to hear her voice again and feel her arms wrapped around me.  So the sobbing intensified. She used to say over the phone, get a pillow and squeeze really tight…that’s me hugging you.  I did just that to one of my sons’ teddy bears.  Once my nose was so stuffy that I could no longer breathe, I decided to get up and shower.  It was in the streaming of the warm water that I could hear God talking through the sound of Mommy’s voice in my ear.  It’s gonna be alright Girl, just pray! Your children will be fine…God’s got everything you need…I am still here with you…I am a part of you, so go forth and pray in your own power.  I transitioned, but my spirit is still very much alive.  Pray Baby-girl, God hears you!

And so it is that I now pray for you… (you can grab a pillow or just wrap your arms around yourself)

Lord I come to you this morning thanking you for your grace and mercy.  Thank you Lord for sending people into our lives to show us ourselves and to introduce us to You.  I pray for my brother or sister, who is reading this right now.  Help them to feel your presence in their life.  Allow them to open themselves up to the possibility that You have everything they will ever need; all they have to do is surrender their will to yours.  Help them to know that it’s in the surrendering of self that You show up! Thank you that you are a God that can meet us anytime and anywhere, whether it’s in the stillness of the night or in the chaos of the day.  Help them to walk in faith and not fear.  Thank you that the prayers of the righteous avails much (James 5:16) or more simply put… the prayers of the faithful are truly helpful.  Now as we close this prayer, thank you for allowing me to be the conduit through which someone might receive peace today.  Help them to pass the blessing on by praying for someone else.  In Jesus name, Amen!

Now go forth in prayer, as you walk it out!

Position yourself for Purpose

Have you ever been to a sporting event, like a basketball game?

Regardless of how many people that are on the team roster, only 5 players can be on the floor at any given time. Under normal circumstances, each of these five players plays a specific position with a different role.  The center generally plays closest to the basket on both offense and defense. He has to jump as high as possible for rebounds and needs to be able to defend against and block shots from inside.  The power forward is closest to the center in playing style, but is typically faster and slightly more athletic.  The small forward isn’t really small compared to most people; but he's usually the shorter of the two forwards on the team.  The shooting guard is usually the player that takes most of the shots. He needs to be an outside shooter, including from a three-point range.  The point guard is usually the best ball handler, dribbler, and passer on the team. He handles the ball more than any other player, generally bringing the ball down the court and initiating the offensive plays.

Sometimes there are individuals that can play more than one role, but in most cases the player is hired to carry out a particular function.  What if the shooting guard decided that he didn’t want to make those 3-point shots, but would rather play closest to the basket in the center's spot?  I’ll tell you what would happen, the team would be out of balance.  The 5 players on the floor would be at a disadvantage because they are no longer working as a cohesive unit, with each individual carrying out their particular function.  There is good news though! There is a coach on the sidelines that can see what the players can’t see. The coach draws up specific plays that best utilizes the gifts and talents of the individual, so the team can work effectively as a unit.

Well, life is just like that. We have been given very specific instructions from our Creator.  Instructions that are needed to carry out the purpose and mission of our lives.  God wired each and every one of us to fulfill our life’s purpose, but so many of us are living below our potential because we are simply out of place.  We have forgotten the specific place that God has already directed us to go.  He once whispered to our Spirits, the direction in which he wants us to go and what purpose our life is to fulfill.  Somehow, during the chaos of life, we have forgotten the mark of the Creator on us.  So we struggle with relationships, unhealthy lifestyles, mental stability, self-worth and so much more because we decided not to hear the voice of the Coach and began running our own plays.  I dare say it’s time to surrender to the will of the Coach and Creator.

I challenge you to reposition yourself, so that you can hear the voice of the Coach.  He is yelling plays from the sidelines trying to get you back on track.  As a coach, it’s not his job to run out on the court and run the play for you.  Only you can play the game; but you are most effective when you actually listen to the instructions of the coach and work your own skill set.

It is time to regain your rightful position as a child of God.  God has a plan for you that He’d like to share with you.  It is your decision whether or not you will tune out the shouting of the crowd and focus solely on His voice.   God is challenging each of us to reposition ourselves, so that we can live out our life’s purpose.

I hear the sound of the buzzer................let the game begin!

Mother's Day Tribute to my Mommy, Nelda J. Mattison

As Mother’s Day 2013, quickly approaches, realizing that this will be the first year that I don’t have my Mommy to celebrate with, several questions enter my mind.

1.     How should I feel since Mommy is not here?  Afterall, she is my mother and this day is set aside to honor all mothers.

2.     Should I just boycott the day and all of its celebrations?

3.     Should I cry every time someone says “Happy Mother’s Day”?

4.     If I am actually happy on that day, will I dishonor her memory?

These questions are all based upon the “voices in my head” that are constantly ringing.  There have been so many people that have shared their experience with me of losing their mother.  “ Girl, after my mother died, I just fell apart.  I cried all day, every day”.  They meant well, but oftimes they would impose their experience on me, as if that should also by experience.

So if I don’t go through or feel the same way, do I love my mother any less?

Well, of course not!

This Mother’s Day I CHOOSE to celebrate life like never before.  My mother lit up this earth for 74 years.

She lived.

She taught.

She encouraged.

She prayed.

She fasted.

She uplifted.

She corrected.

She cheered.

She cried.

She sang.

She wrote.

She walked.

She danced.

She praised.

She kissed.

She cuddled.

She wiped.

She loved.

She poured herself daily and unselfishly into so many others, so that we could experience the many joys of life.  She instilled confidence in me, so that I would be strong enough to go out into the world and conquer it.

Shouldn’t I be depressed and devastated that she is no longer physically present in my life?  I could be, but I choose not to be.

I CHOOSE to celebrate the part of Mommy that lives in me.  Even as she lay on her deathbed, she was unselfish.  She began calling the names of each of her children: Barry, Garry, Sharri and Torre and prayed for us.  She was pouring out of her spirit and still speaking into our lives; the same way she had always done, since we were children.  And when it was finally time to say goodbye and she was done pouring out…she allowed Daddy to pour into her.  On that glorious day of PEACE, Daddy rubbed her forehead and sang to her a sweet melody.  She stopped long enough to allow him to bless her, before she departed this earthly home and changed residence to her Heavenly home.

Again I ask, should I be disheartened?  NO.

I miss her, but I know that she has simply changed positions.  Instead of getting on her knees, alongside the bed, or sitting upright in a chair praying, she now sits at the right hand of the Father pointing down at us.

“Lord, do you see my husband  James down there and my children and grandbabies? Oh look at  Momma, she looks so good ... Nita and Celestine take good care of her.  Please continue to bless them Father.  Allow James to feel you God, especially since I am not in the apartment with him.  Well actually, I guess I am…

Do you see where he hung my plaque and our wedding picture?  Right at the front door! He really does love me! Lord, I just can’t wait to see the mirror that he is going to hang up, behind the couch; the one that we talked about getting.  I know that he is going to be alright, because the kids are going to look after him and make sure that he is well.  Oh yeah Lord… that was pretty righteous how you hooked up my baby boy with a great opportunity.  Yes God, I can't help but  sing your praises ALL day, because you’ve been so good!”

Sad? Maybe a little...

But still rejoicing because since I was introduced to Nelda J. Mattison, nearly 42 years ago, my life has been blessed.  She poured out and into me, so that I, in turn, could pour into others. 

I love you Mommy and I say, Happy Mother’s Day!  Knowing you the way that I do, you have probably written another little song or ditty to all of those who were once earthly mothers.  How do I know this? Because that’s just you! 

I’m head over heels in love with you Mommy!

Your # 1 and only baby-girl,

Sharri Lor

Could vs. Should

In the book, You Can Heal Your Life, by Louise Hay, she mentions that there is one word that she wishes could be stricken from the English language.  That word is SHOULD!

The word should is defined as such...Used to indicate obligation, duty, or correctness, typically when criticizing someone's actions: "he should have been careful" .  It's such a powerful, yet condemning word.  If you think back to the last time you used the  word 'should', were you pointing your finger?  Were you trying to convey to your child, spouse, coworker or friend that something was done incorrectly?  Were you placing yourself in a position of high moral authority?  Probably so, if we are to be honest.  But what is most damaging is using the word on ourselves and replaying it on our mind.

• I should have gone to or finished college.
• I should have moved.
• I should have married someone else.
• I should have waited to have children.
• I should have left the job long ago.
• I should have eaten better.
• I should have gone to the doctor sooner.
• I should have gone to the gym.
• I should have _______________ (you fill in the blank).

Don't you feel heavy after just reading those statements?  It's as if you have no control over what happens in your life.  You are probably saying to yourself, "aww man, I should have done this or that thing, because I probably wouldn't be in the position that I'm in right now.  Well I'd like to posit into your spirit that if you would change the word should to could, things will start looking better.

The word could is  "used to indicate possibility".  It is a word that signifies hope and choice.  Could is an equally powerful word!  Could does not allow you to be led by the situation, but it helps you to reorient yourself,  in the midst of the situation.  Statements using the word 'could', show that you are hopeful that things will happen for you, if you take certain actions.

• I could further my education right now, if I search for a school that caters to older adults.
• I could put the love back in my marriage, if I do those things that I used to do that we both enjoyed.
• I could move now, if I save my money, step out on faith and just do it.
• I could learn to love and appreciate the stages that my children are in right now.
• I could apply for a new job or find ways to enhance my performance at my present job.
• I could eat more healthy foods, get off the couch and walk around the block once each day.
• I could _________________ (fill in the blank).

These 'could' statements are all a sign of optimism, hope and enthusiasm.  It places YOU back in control.  It is not a word of condemnation, but a word of choice.

You can choose how you want your life to play out.  Make a decision and stick to it.  If you don't like it, change it.  You have the power! It's time that we stop beating ourselves up and living in the place of lack. God wants us to live fulfilled lives.  John 10:10b says, "I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly." 

Now you could read this and still go back to the same negative thought patterns that tend to cripple you.  Or you could make up in your mind that I will make a conscious effort to think more positively, be more hopeful and take action.  The bottom line is, THE CHOICE IS YOURS!

Now walk it out...

Please invade my space!

The most amazing thing happened to me today.  I had to be a blessing in the midst of my hurt and it felt so good.

For the last 11 days, I have been Wonder Woman, caring for my parents.  Speaking life, health and wholeness in the midst of our situation.  It was difficult leaving them to return back to my own family. I wanted to store them in my luggage and bring them home with me.  Of course, we know that is not possible.  So I boarded the plane in tears, as I said goodbye to my Daddy.

My first flight was 3 hours and 50 minutes, the layover was as an hour and the next flight would be 45 minutes.  That wouldn’t be so bad if I were actually going to be home, but I still had another flight to catch.  Can you say, "serious fatigue!".

During my layover, I was trying to coordinate the last leg of the flight and I had a meltdown right there in the middle of the airport.

No more shiny bracelets and no more form fitting patriotic outfit, high heeled boots, tiara with the red star and the gold lasso.  Wonder Woman was plain old Sharri, who couldn’t fight the tears any longer.  I had to go into a stall in the ladies room and just cry.  I couldn’t stop.  I just couldn’t stop. Upon exiting the stall, I went to the sink still sniffling and trying to control the tears, as women walked around me and said NOTHING.  No – “Miss are you alright?”  “Can I call someone for you?”  “ Are you in trouble?” Nothing-just silence and eye aversion.  I eventually got it together and called my husband to arrange my pick-up from the airport, which would not occur until 8:45 pm.  As I waited for the next flight, I was able to calm down and board the plane.

Suddenly I hear a young lady, walking down the airplane aisle, talking on the phone using expletives.  She was obviously upset about something, because she kept using the same two words over and over again.  I must admit, I immediately judged her.  I said beautiful girl, ugly insides! She sat directly behind me.  Great!  As we were preparing to taxi the runway, I could hear those same 2 words ringing in my ears.  In a few more minutes, I heard sobbing.

"OK Sharri, what are you going to do?"  

Here’s another woman in tears and she is being ignored, this time by me.  Do I invade her space? Do I act as if I really don’t hear her?  Do I ignore the fact the she has covered her entire head with the soft, blue airplane blanket?  I couldn’t do that!  I simply turned around, touched her leg and ask if she was going to be alright.  When she uncovered her head, I saw a frightened woman, eyes red, sobbing uncontrollably, who whispers, “I’m scared, I don’t like this feeling”.  Without thinking, I continued to rub her leg (while another woman just looked at us), instructed her to take deep breaths and turn her overhead air on.  Once I realized that she was breathing more steadily, I assured her that she would be alright and turned back around for the remainder of the flight.

It was at that moment that I smiled inside and I realized how important it is to invade someone’s space from time to time.  I had to feel temporary loneliness in that bathroom stall, just so I could empathize with that woman on the airplane and minister to her.  I faced the fear of rejection by standing up and doing what I honestly felt in my heart...compassion. At the end of the day, I believe each of us wants to know that we matter and that we are not invisible.  Maybe you need to let someone know that you see them, hear them and that you value the fact that they are a part of the universe. 

God can heal your heart and you can be a help, even in the midst of your hurt.  But you might just have to take a chance and step outside of your comfort zone.  You matter to God and someone else needs to know that their existence matters to you.

Now walk in your healing and go invade someone’s space.