If you are above the age of 30, you know this phrase quite well and probably know exactly where you were when you heard it. (Hint: The OJ trial). Well of course we aren't talking about him today, this is about you and I and the great lengths we go to, in order to make something fit.
So let's have a podiatric teaching moment. I'm sure you have heard of corns and callouses. It's those dry patches of skin on the bottom of your feet or on the bend of your toes. They are usually caused by an excessive amount of friction that a shoe places on high pressure points of the foot. At times, they can be unsightly, so we get a pedicure where the nail tech buffs or sands down the extra layer of skin. No problem right? Sure, if you don't go back to the same thing that caused the extra friction in the first place. There is another type of corn though that no one else can see but you. It's called heloma molle, or soft corn. A soft corn, commonly found between the 4th & 5th toes, is usually caused by an abnormality in bone shape of the toes. Extra pressure is put on this area by adjacent bones rubbing up against each other, especially seen in women wearing high heels and forcing extra pressure to the front of the foot inside a narrow shoe toe box.
Class is in session. Are you still with me?
The soft corn may get better if you switch to flatter shoes with a wider toe box, allowing for each toe to have space and not abut each other. If this doesn't work though, it may call for surgery to reshape the bones that are causing the problem. So you do know that you're not reading this, so you can enter podiatric medical school. There is always a life lesson!
So I must tell you a story...
My husband and I had the opportunity to get away for a few days and last night we went to dinner. I had packed a comfortable black & white maxi dress, but had forgotten the shoes at home. Rather than choose a different outfit and wear shoes that I had in my suitcase, I got the bright idea to hunt for a pair of shoes close to the hotel. (I mean it doesn't take much for me to have a reason to shop.) Yes, I could have worn the black sandals that were in my suitcase, but I know that my husband likes to see me in heels, because my calves are poppin'. (Okay, so now that I'm saying that....it's really dumb because the dress was so long that he couldn't see my calves anyway.) Duh!
When I went to the neighboring shopping area (not a mall), I walked into a store that had several black shoes. I saw one of the cutest black wedges, but they didn't have my size. The saleswoman showed me another shoe, but all she had was a 9.5, not a 10. She told me to try it on because the shoes ran big anyway. Sure enough the right shoe fit just fine, but that left shoe was another story. I even said to her, I have problems with my left foot, so I'm really not sure. (Side note: About 6-7 years ago, while on family vacation, I was trying to convince my younger son to jump in the hotel pool. To show him that I wasn't afraid, I ran and jumped high in the air and into the water to create a splash and squeal with laughter. However my squeal was one of pain...I had jumped into the wrong end of the pool (only3.5 feet) and jammed my left big toe on the bottom of the pool. Honestly, thank God I didn't break my foot. Since that time however, my left foot has not been the same and I'm noticing more and more that as I age and fluctuate in weight, my left foot becomes more challenging to fit into a cute shoe.) So back to the story...
I knew that I shouldn't have purchased that shoe, but it was cute AND 40% off. It was a done deal! I immediately had buyer's remorse, but I went back to the hotel to shower and get ready for dinner. Of course, my hubby loved the shoe so I put it on. But before leaving for dinner, I had to take the shoe off, pull out the hotel blow dryer, trying to heat the leather, and stretch the shoe before placing it back on. Because I'm a podiatrist, I know how to shave the soft corn between the toes; so I basically performed bathroom surgery on myself. (Those little black sandals were still calling my name. "Pick me...oooh please pick me".) I ignored the cries of the sandal and put the heels on anyway. (I'm not totally stupid though, because I did wrap the sandals and place them inside of my purse.) Initially walking in them was not that bad. But as we rode to the restaurant, I could feel a dull aching pain creeping from my foot to my leg and on up into my thigh. My foot joints were maligned and it was causing a discomfort that was beginning to affect other parts of my body. I tried to shift in the car, but it still was uncomfortable. After a while my body got used to the pain and blocked it out. (The body has a way to adapt and push past or numb the pain.) As I entered the restaurant, my foot was no longer an issue, especially after a glass of wine. (...Don't judge me!) I was fine, until after dinner when it was time to stand and walk back to the car. As soon as I got in the car, I pulled those sandals out and my little toes began to cheer.
So what do these black pumps have to do with my life, you ask.
They have every thing to do with you and I and how we continue to keep things that are not good for us. It's about how we keep things around us to "save face". It's about how easy it us for us to ignore the tiny little voice in our head that tries to warn us to act differently. It's about how we live in the past, because it's familiar, and we've learned how to numb the pain. It's how we are afraid to branch out and try something new for fear that we will be judged or not liked. This is about our lives!
As a I mentioned, my accident happened about 5-6 years ago and it's been progressively getting worse. Do you think that I should have changed my shoe style a long time ago to prevent this day from coming? See the problem was not just the jamming of the big toe. The jamming caused my 1st metatarsal-phalangeal joint to be compromised, so the bones can no longer glide on each other smoothly. So my big toe is limited, which caused my other joints in my foot to shift, which when jammed into a tight toe box, causes friction between the 4th & 5th toe, leaving me with a painful soft corn that no one else can see. The problem is that I can lie to myself and act as if nothing is wrong, because the corn is not visible to anyone. The corn may not be visible, but the effects of the corn are palpable.
People may not see the corn, but they see you limping.
People may not see the corn, but they see you wince in pain.
People may not see the corn, but they can see your change in attitude when you are tested and have to walk a long distance.
People may not see the corn, but they observe how you numb the pain by drinking or snapping or lying and acting as if everything is alright. But deep down inside, you are hurting at the core.
So what can we do about it now? It's time to raid the closet and get rid of those things that are keeping us bound and locked into a state of pain.
Maybe it's those green, suede sling-backs of envy....maybe you're jealous of your co-worker or a sibling.
You need to let it go!
Maybe it's those navy patent leather, open-toed shoes of a hard heart...someone hurt you in the past, while you were open and vulnerable, so now you have created this false sense of toughness and speak with a sharp tongue.
You need to let it go!
Maybe it's those strappy, black red-bottoms...for each strap that covers the skin, there is an open space that leaves you exposed.
You need to let it go!
Let go of the past hurts, pains, incidents, accidents, things that you cannot change! They do not suit you well. If you keep them around for too long, they will only cause other problems. So let it go!
Make the decision right now, to let go of the past and live smarter, wiser and healthier, so you can move into the next phase of your life. When you are no longer living out your past pains, you can move into your future and affect change in other people.
Change your shoes, change you mindset, change your destiny and change your legacy!
Now walk it out...
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