Monday, October 22, 2018

Are you living on cruise control? And how's that working for you?

     Have you ever felt like you were living your life on cruise control?  You set a certain speed a while ago and now you are moving aimlessly throughout life, trying to keep up.  Cruise control, in a car, works best when you're on the highway traveling, if it's a pretty simple terrain and not too many other cars around.  It works best when everyone is traveling at a similar pace.  As long as you keep steering and the car is under control, you are moving along just fine.  Let's say that you set the cruise control to 70mph, the car takes over. and operates at that speed.  If the terrain shifts and you now hit an upward hill, the car senses it and begins to accelerate temporarily in order to maintain an average speed of 70.  In like manner, if you are now traversing a downward hill, the car will decelerate accordingly.  Again, this works on the highway when you are alert and able to flow with traffic.  But cruise control is not your friend if you're tired or if there's too much traffic on the highway.

     Each year there are so many automobile accidents because the driver set the cruise control, but fell asleep at the wheel, rendering them unable to give the car a different command.  So the car simply continued cruising and the lulled driver never realized that the traffic had slowed, there was a sharp turn was ahead or that the terrain had changed.  Before you know it, the car and the driver have gone off the road.  The reality is most of these accidents end tragically and take out more than just the driver of this car. This type of tragedy occurs not because the driver was intoxicated or was a distracted driver, but simply because the driver was comfortable and allowed the car to operate on cruise control.

     But how many of us have set our lives up like this?  We've been following the same patterns day in and day out and not much has changed over the years.  The kids are fine, the marriage is fine, the job is fine so we keep doing the same things over and over again.  We 've grown accustomed to operating out of habit, rather than moving with a set goal or purpose.  We missed the exit or the opportunity to get off and travel on a more scenic route a long time ago.  We opt to stay in the center lane and keep up with the moving traffic, even though we know that there is an exit ahead that will allow us to slow down and enjoy the sites.  We know that we need to pause for a moment and refuel, but now we're moving at such a pace that we're afraid to brake and signal that we'd like to get off the highway to take a different path.  I must admit that in my own experience with driving long distances, one of the passengers will say that they need to use the restroom and the driver will drive past a few exits, in an effort to make good time.  It's usually not until the passenger has stated several times that they REALLY need to use the restroom that the driver will finally slow down and pull off the highway.  Now everyone inside of the car is stressed and it usually ends with the passenger jumping out of the car trying to make it to the restroom without embarrassing him/herself. (Yikes...I've been both passenger and driver in this situation.  Now that I stop and think about it....that's not cool at all.)

    We've gotten so used to doing things a certain way that now it's hard to admit that you really would like to change things up a bit and move at a different pace or pull off the highway temporarily.  So the family keeps moving in the same direction, the marriage is maintained, the job is adequate but not meaningful, the finances never change (operating in lack) and relationships don't evolve.  Don't misunderstand me, life is good and manageable, you're still relatively happy, but you've also hit a place of stagnation.  The people (traffic) around you is dependent upon you not braking nor breaking the cycle.  Everyone has gotten so accustomed to you moving, acting, existing at a certain pace that it might be uncomfortable for both you and them to slow down.  You're so fearful to "keep up" that you missed the exit because you were moving too quickly.  You feel the cars behind you bearing down on you and the cars on either side, keeping you boxed in.  You are traveling in the middle of the highway, many times feeling helpless because you feel like you are 'stuck' with no where else to go.

   Well I've got good news for you....

    It takes one decision, one signal, one action to end this trajectory and for you to regain control of your situation. One pause, one idea, one act of bravery to keep from traveling at a speed that could potentially harm you and those around you.  It's time to brake!  I didn't say stop, just tap on the brakes.  In your car, if the car is on cruise control, a gentle tap of the brake pedal signals to the car computer that YOU have now regained control of the vehicle.  This gentle tap forces the car to yield to the decisions and directions of the driver once again.  You can now safely move through traffic at a speed determined only by the driver.

     I believe that's what most of us need....a gentle tap on the brakes to break the cycle.  It's okay for you to want more out of life. It's alright for you to want to slow down and take in the scenery.  It's time for you to regain control of your life and operate accordingly. You think that by braking, you might miss something and will mess up the flow of traffic.  But the truth is, you're probably headed for a crash or burn out because you've been lulled to sleep by operating on cruise control.  You're only doing it because you are afraid to drive purposely again.  In fact, you've been operating like this for so long that you are now fearful of braking and breaking the cycle.  It's time to make a change.

     When you signal that you are changing lanes and moving, it also serves as a wake up call to the people around you to be more alert.  Don't be lulled by the status quo, the normalcy or the expectation of reaching your destination at a certain time.  Take charge and tap the brakes!  Slow down, be deliberate, be contemplative, be mindful and operate with intention, purpose and passion.  You don't want to miss this particular rest stop exit because the next one might not come for several miles.  Don't cheat yourself by going with the flow.  You're destiny is waiting for you!  Your intended purpose is coming up ahead.  Your life's work is calling your name just around the bend, so prepare to exit the busy highway and regain control of your life.  In this instance, cruise control is NOT your friend.  Grab the steering wheel, tap the brakes and regain complete control of your car and signal for the next exit.  Your life depends on it! The future of your family is wrapped up in it!  Your peace of mind is inextricably bound to it!

Now tap it out...

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