What in the World?!!!
My heart is heavy as I type this. This morning I will attend the funeral services for a Powerhouse of a woman today in Oklahoma City. They said that she preached on Sunday and danced all around the pulpit and on Monday morning she had gone to be with the Lord. I am aware of the divine providence of God, but I am in shock. There were no reports of her being sick. She was here one day doing God's work and gone to glory the very next day.
She and I did not have monthly coffee dates, we didn't talk on the phone, we never emailed back and forth, but I still sense a major loss. Although she is not in my phone contact list, whenever we saw each other throughout the City, we'd embrace, exchange pleasantries and encourage one another to keep going. Not only did she preach at our church once or twice, but I frequented many local women's conferences where she gave the keynote address. I'm telling you this woman could "say it & slay it" and she did it with such conviction, poise and grace. She was simply beautiful, both inside and out.
Although we weren't close, I respected who she was, the work that she did and what she represented. She was married and co-pastored with her husband. She had children and grandchildren. She was an administrator at a local school. So when you looked at her life, it appeared that she was a healthy vibrant woman in her early 50's just doing her thing. Learning of her death really caught me off guard and has gotten me to take a look at my life more closely.
As women, we wear so many different hats these days. Wife, Mother/Grandmother, Business woman/ Entrepreneur, Pastor/Minister, Preacher/ Worship leader, Counselor/Coach, Encourager/Exhorter, Caregiver/ Nurturer and so much more. Oftentimes people look in amazement as we navigate these spaces, but they don't really know the story. The feelings of heartache, loss, fatigue, stress, under-appreciation, dismay, trepidation and anxiety never surfaces because we're so busy doing that we have forgotten how to just BE. We've accepted the sense of tiredness as normal, when in actuality there is nothing normal about it. ( You can say AMEN or OUCH right here!) It's true...many times we put the needs of others before our own and never recognize our needs, desires or longings.
I really want to do God's work and fulfill the purpose that He has for me. Because of this declaration, I must get in tune with my mind, body and soul once again. I've noticed that my weight has fluctuated since my husband was sick the first time. I was so intentional about taking care of him that I forgot to really take care of myself. ( That's only partially true....walking my dog has been my exercise and stress reliever over the last 6 months. Thanks Arby!) Next week I will make an appointment with my general practitioner just to have blood-work done....checking cholesterol, blood pressure and thyroid activity. I've had a gift card for a massage since February and I've yet to use it. I'm scheduling an appointment this week. Two weeks ago, a dear friend invited me to lunch, she just poured into me and talked about maintaining a healthy life balance. She even pointed out the fact that you should be intentional when choosing restaurants. Finding places that are peaceful and calming, increases your mindfulness during eating, which can aid in proper digestion.
As busy women, we should not only be good to others, but it's so important to be good to ourselves. I encourage you today to take time for yourself and share the love, but also recognize when you need to keep some things for yourself. My mother-in-law always says, " you can't give from an empty cup". Make sure that you are full and not depleted. In case you realize that you are about to run on empty, reach out to a friend for prayer and conversation, so you can be refilled. Powerhouse Women....let's be that "safe place to land" for each other.
As I prepare to get dressed to go celebrate the life of one of God's jewels, I am mindful that I must protect my mind, body and soul as I do the work that God has called me to do. I encourage you to do the same. Pleasing God should never mean that you sacrifice YOU, so remember to be good to yourself today. You deserve it!
Now walk it out...
Saturday, June 18, 2016
Tuesday, June 7, 2016
Too many lines in the water
In an earlier post, I mentioned that my husband and I had taken up fishing. After his bouts of illness, we needed to find a way to de-stress. The first time that he and I went out, we caught four catfish and it blew us away. There was a pause the next time because he didn't go with me...no fish on the line. The next time I accompanied him, we caught 22 crappie or perch. (I still don't know what they were.) They were so small that we probably should have just done catch & release. However, we were so proud, took pictures and went back to the house to try and clean and cook them.
On any given day, my husband will stop by the fishing & hunting stores and sporting good stores in our area to find the latest "stink bait" or the jig with the most shiny colors. It's pretty hilarious to watch him get so excited. We've even taken our younger son fishing with us and as soon as he would throw out the line, he'd want to retrieve it almost immediately. ( For him, it was about casting the perfect line. That was funny to watch also, because I see how much these 2 fellas are really alike.)
Yesterday was a beautiful day and we ventured out to find another "honey hole" as anglers call it; we'd heard of a few good places to catch fish. When we arrived, it was so serene and beautiful. We listened to the calls and cries of the different birds, the buzzing sounds of bees and flies and Lord-knows-what-else flying around our heads and the gentle swishes of the water as fish leaped out of the water periodically. Well I'm sad to report that none of these leaping fish leaped into our fishing net or got caught on the hook. We were there for hours and caught NOTHING. We were still happy and peaceful, ate lunch, drove back home, took showers, rested, got the family situated for the evening and decided to go back outdoors for yet another fishing excursion. This time there was a little more activity. We visited a local lake where there are biking and walking trails and people for days. There was so much activity here, but it was still great to be outdoors to experience the beauty of nature. (I was a little salty however because the area where we set up shop didn't have 2 trees close enough to hang my hammock. I can't believe that I'm really becoming a country 'outdoorsy' girl.) Anyway, we had 3-4 lines in the water, with different types of bait to catch different fish. The catfish combo line had stink bait to attract the deeper catfish, so we added heavier weights to sink closer to the bottom. Two of the other lines had worms that I'd threaded on the hook to catch different types of fish and he had one line with a jig attached. This jig moves all the time and makes noises under water to attract other types of fish. I'm clueless, I just like to throw the line in, feel the pull of the line and then reel in the fish. Last night, we were outsmarted by the fish because they found ways to eat the worms off of the hook without getting stuck. (I was just outdone!)
This morning as I laid in bed, reflecting on yesterday's outdoor adventures, I began to wonder how it was that we caught 4 nice-sized fish on our first trip and now that we had all the accoutrements of fishing caught NOTHING. (Oh I apologize, my husband did catch a small one last night, but we decided to catch & release. No fish-fry!)
I began to compare the two excursions and this is what was brought to my attention...
On our first time out fishing, we had no idea what we were doing and God was just kind to us. I think we actually rolled up on a school of fish and were able to catch them. Due to our lack of knowledge, and not knowing at the time what a "school of fish" was, we could have caught more but I stopped to go to the bathroom and to get something to eat. At that time both of us had only one fishing rod in the water. He had a line and I had my own line, so it was easy to keep track of when the bobber moved or disappeared under water. Yesterday we had 4-5 lines in the water and were utterly confused because we kept crossing each others lines. He would cast in my area and when I would reel my line back in it would disturb his line. Several times our lines got tangled and we wasted time untangling. Other times, my bobber would move but by the time I ran back to the 1st line, the fish had already maneuvered the worm off of the hook. Had I been watching my one line, I would have known the exact time to pull up and hook the fish in the mouth.
But isn't this our lives at times?
When we are laser-focused on one or two things, we can usually make things happen. We have time to notice the tiny nuances and details, so when something changes we can quickly make the necessary adjustments. However when we try to do everything and please everyone; we usually go home empty-handed and spirits low because all of our efforts didn't work. Personally, I am finding this to be true in my career and in the education of my children. Some of you may see it in your health, your family or in your life in general. It seems that I have a thousand lines in the water (or as the old folk would say, too many irons in the fire) and I keep wondering why nothing is biting the line. And God just showed me that perhaps I need to go back to the basics: pray more for guidance, focus on one or two things (not 10) and just wait patiently for God to deliver. When the timing is just right and I'm expectant, yet 'still and surrendered'.... the right fish will jump the line. (And it will be a significant enough blessing that I don't have to "catch & release".) When God provides it, it's mine to keep.
So let me encourage you today, if you keep tripping over the same things and making the same silly mistakes and just obviously missing the blessings or peace of mind; sit back and take a real look at the situation. Do you have too many lines in the water that are continually getting tangled? Is your attention on line number 5 when you could actually be focused on your line, which is line number 1? The blessing is right there and you can see the bobber going under water; but your timing is off and you keep missing the blessing.
Perhaps it's time to just focus on YOUR line (maybe one or two, but definitely not five).
Be blessed, cast the number of lines that you can handle and walk it out...
On any given day, my husband will stop by the fishing & hunting stores and sporting good stores in our area to find the latest "stink bait" or the jig with the most shiny colors. It's pretty hilarious to watch him get so excited. We've even taken our younger son fishing with us and as soon as he would throw out the line, he'd want to retrieve it almost immediately. ( For him, it was about casting the perfect line. That was funny to watch also, because I see how much these 2 fellas are really alike.)
Yesterday was a beautiful day and we ventured out to find another "honey hole" as anglers call it; we'd heard of a few good places to catch fish. When we arrived, it was so serene and beautiful. We listened to the calls and cries of the different birds, the buzzing sounds of bees and flies and Lord-knows-what-else flying around our heads and the gentle swishes of the water as fish leaped out of the water periodically. Well I'm sad to report that none of these leaping fish leaped into our fishing net or got caught on the hook. We were there for hours and caught NOTHING. We were still happy and peaceful, ate lunch, drove back home, took showers, rested, got the family situated for the evening and decided to go back outdoors for yet another fishing excursion. This time there was a little more activity. We visited a local lake where there are biking and walking trails and people for days. There was so much activity here, but it was still great to be outdoors to experience the beauty of nature. (I was a little salty however because the area where we set up shop didn't have 2 trees close enough to hang my hammock. I can't believe that I'm really becoming a country 'outdoorsy' girl.) Anyway, we had 3-4 lines in the water, with different types of bait to catch different fish. The catfish combo line had stink bait to attract the deeper catfish, so we added heavier weights to sink closer to the bottom. Two of the other lines had worms that I'd threaded on the hook to catch different types of fish and he had one line with a jig attached. This jig moves all the time and makes noises under water to attract other types of fish. I'm clueless, I just like to throw the line in, feel the pull of the line and then reel in the fish. Last night, we were outsmarted by the fish because they found ways to eat the worms off of the hook without getting stuck. (I was just outdone!)
This morning as I laid in bed, reflecting on yesterday's outdoor adventures, I began to wonder how it was that we caught 4 nice-sized fish on our first trip and now that we had all the accoutrements of fishing caught NOTHING. (Oh I apologize, my husband did catch a small one last night, but we decided to catch & release. No fish-fry!)
I began to compare the two excursions and this is what was brought to my attention...
On our first time out fishing, we had no idea what we were doing and God was just kind to us. I think we actually rolled up on a school of fish and were able to catch them. Due to our lack of knowledge, and not knowing at the time what a "school of fish" was, we could have caught more but I stopped to go to the bathroom and to get something to eat. At that time both of us had only one fishing rod in the water. He had a line and I had my own line, so it was easy to keep track of when the bobber moved or disappeared under water. Yesterday we had 4-5 lines in the water and were utterly confused because we kept crossing each others lines. He would cast in my area and when I would reel my line back in it would disturb his line. Several times our lines got tangled and we wasted time untangling. Other times, my bobber would move but by the time I ran back to the 1st line, the fish had already maneuvered the worm off of the hook. Had I been watching my one line, I would have known the exact time to pull up and hook the fish in the mouth.
But isn't this our lives at times?
When we are laser-focused on one or two things, we can usually make things happen. We have time to notice the tiny nuances and details, so when something changes we can quickly make the necessary adjustments. However when we try to do everything and please everyone; we usually go home empty-handed and spirits low because all of our efforts didn't work. Personally, I am finding this to be true in my career and in the education of my children. Some of you may see it in your health, your family or in your life in general. It seems that I have a thousand lines in the water (or as the old folk would say, too many irons in the fire) and I keep wondering why nothing is biting the line. And God just showed me that perhaps I need to go back to the basics: pray more for guidance, focus on one or two things (not 10) and just wait patiently for God to deliver. When the timing is just right and I'm expectant, yet 'still and surrendered'.... the right fish will jump the line. (And it will be a significant enough blessing that I don't have to "catch & release".) When God provides it, it's mine to keep.
So let me encourage you today, if you keep tripping over the same things and making the same silly mistakes and just obviously missing the blessings or peace of mind; sit back and take a real look at the situation. Do you have too many lines in the water that are continually getting tangled? Is your attention on line number 5 when you could actually be focused on your line, which is line number 1? The blessing is right there and you can see the bobber going under water; but your timing is off and you keep missing the blessing.
Perhaps it's time to just focus on YOUR line (maybe one or two, but definitely not five).
Be blessed, cast the number of lines that you can handle and walk it out...
Thursday, June 2, 2016
I don't get it God!
It may sound funny, but it is true. Sometimes I really don't get what God is trying to show me.
Have you ever felt this way?
Just when you think you are doing the "right" thing, it seems that the rug gets pulled back out from under your feet. You notice your feet are above your head and you're looking up at your shoes, because once again you've ended up flat on your backside. I suppose it shouldn't be unfamiliar, because surely we've all been in this position before. However, it is annoying to find yourself on the floor.... yet again.
There are several ways to look at this...
The bottom line is, I'm tired of playing the waiting game. So as I wait; I must WORK (stop playing) and worship. There has to be some resolve that kicks in for all of us that says I'm not going to be in this same position for too much longer. So although we may not "get" what God is doing, we must trust that it's all working together for the good (Romans 8:28). It may not 'feel' good, but it's working for my good! Recognize that there are tiny steps that we could be taking right now to advance, if we'd just stop making excuses.
So although I may not "get" what God is doing, I totally "get" who God IS!
We must trust the process, do the work, work the plan and............Walk it out!
Have you ever felt this way?
Just when you think you are doing the "right" thing, it seems that the rug gets pulled back out from under your feet. You notice your feet are above your head and you're looking up at your shoes, because once again you've ended up flat on your backside. I suppose it shouldn't be unfamiliar, because surely we've all been in this position before. However, it is annoying to find yourself on the floor.... yet again.
There are several ways to look at this...
- Is God punishing me? Do I need to repent for something that I've done and recognize these are just consequences of my actions?
- Is God stretching me? Am I supposed to get to the end of myself, so I can learn to totally depend on him?
- Is God waiting on me? Have I been putting everything on God and not using the gifts, talents and resources that He has given me to "do the work"? Maybe I just need to get frustrated enough that I actually start performing the tasks that are well within my capability level.
The bottom line is, I'm tired of playing the waiting game. So as I wait; I must WORK (stop playing) and worship. There has to be some resolve that kicks in for all of us that says I'm not going to be in this same position for too much longer. So although we may not "get" what God is doing, we must trust that it's all working together for the good (Romans 8:28). It may not 'feel' good, but it's working for my good! Recognize that there are tiny steps that we could be taking right now to advance, if we'd just stop making excuses.
So although I may not "get" what God is doing, I totally "get" who God IS!
We must trust the process, do the work, work the plan and............Walk it out!
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