Saturday, February 22, 2014

Live. Love. Learn Women's Empowerment Luncheon

I'd like to share the transcript of my speech that I was able to share with a room full of beautiful sisters, sponsored by HomeCourt Support, Spouses and Family Members of Oklahoma City Thunder Players, Coaches and Basketball Operations Staff.  We enjoyed a delicious lunch at KD' s Southern Cuisine restaurant.  I was honored to share the podium with Ms. Lucille O'Neal, author of "Walk Like You Have Somewhere to Go" and mother of former NBA star, Dr. Shaquille O'Neal.
What a beautiful day!  I pray that although you may not have been there, that you will still gain something from the speech.


Live. Love. Learn.  Hmm?
Three simple words… so short & easy to write.
Live. Love. Learn. 
Three simple words…  precise, yet profound.
……………………………..… concise, yet charming.
Live. Love. Learn. 
Three simple words…. Succinct, yet significant.
…………………………………..little, yet lively.

Live. Love. Learn. 
What does is it mean to live?  Does it simply mean that you can inhale and exhale? Is live merely the opposite of die?  I dare say that as we breathe in and out, allowing the oxygen to travel through the alveoli of our lungs, going throughout all the tissues of our body, allowing it to nourish our muscles and every cell, picking up all the wastes and being expelled as carbon dioxide….many of us  are still dead.
Ø Dead to the dreams that were once placed inside of us.
Ø Dead to the feeling that although I may have failed, I can actually try it again another way.
Ø Dead to the fact that in spite of all the things that I’ve been through that God can still bless my mess.
Ø  Just DEAD! 
Ø Breathing but dead, laughing but dead, crying but dead, in a relationship but dead, having good sex but dead; taking care of our children but dead. 
Dead to the possibility that there is another way.

But thanks be to God My sisters, I caught you just in time….I came to revive you and speak life into your situation today.
 I want you to LIVE.
§  Live with the expectation that life can & will get better.
§  Live with the understanding that your setback is simply a setup for you to be blessed.
§  Live with the recognition that failure is nothing but feedback from the universe for you to re-evaluate your experience, and use the information gained to readjust and try it another way.
§  Live with the knowledge that if you can conquer the inner obstacles or negative voices inside your head, no external obstacle can kill your spirit.
Ladies I want you to inhale…
ü Inhale peace and allow it to run to your pancreas, which produces the insulin that comes to the rescue during digestion and helps to lower the blood sugar levels, which protects your cells.
ü Inhale joy and allow it to run to your jejunum (which is part of the small intestine… because I want you to feel joy in the pit of your belly)
ü Inhale understanding and let it tickle the uvula at the back of your throat. So every thing that enters your mouth has to be sprinkled with a little understanding and you don’t take things so personally.
ü Inhale expectation and watch it stir up the endocrine glands,which will secrete the right amount of hormones into your bloodstream, keeping you even- keeled.
ü Inhale forgiveness and let it reach your feet, so as you are walking along your journey you are less likely to lash out at others, but you stand ready to forgive.

Come on ladies…. breathe it in…. breathe it in…. YES, you’re beginning to LIVE.

Now that you’ve begun to LIVE, you have to move onward to LOVE. There are different forms and styles of expressing love. To describe these styles, the Ancient Greeks came up with four terms:
1. Agapeà : This is an unconditional love that sees beyond the outer surface and accepts the recipient for whom he/she is, regardless of their flaws, shortcomings or faults. It’s the type of love that everyone strives to have for their fellow human beings.
2. Phileoà The phileo love refers to an affectionate, warm and tender platonic love. It makes you desire friendship with someone.
3. Storgeà This is the love that parents naturally feel for their children; the love that members of the family have for each other.
4. ErosàEros is a passionate and intense love that arouses romantic feelings. It’s an emotional and sexual love.

But I think we are missing one and it’s probably the most important one.
               This type of love enables you to live with purpose.
               This type of love helps you make sound decisions that can enhance your life.
               This type of love will allow you to get up and walk for just 20 minutes a day, because you know exercise strengthens  your body.
                This type of love gives you the courage to say no when the action would compromise your belief system.
                This type of love will make you go sit in a quiet room for 15 minutes, just to clear your mind, so you can re-emerge rejuvenated.
               This type of love says, “Put on your oxygen mask first and then assist the person sitting next to you”.

This type of love is the greatest love of all…..what is it Ladies?...SELF-LOVE.

o  It cannot be bought in a beauty store, does not come with a makeover, or with a new set of clothes.
o  Self-love does not come from the latest book or inspirational reading. 
o  Self- love does not come by watching Oprah (Super soul Sunday) or Iyanla (Fix my Life).
o  Self-love is learning how to decipher that still, small voice inside, when God whispers into your spirit and tells you how special you are, that He would guide you and what purpose your life is to fulfill.

Today my Sisters, I want you to turn to the correct frequency of your Soul.
(take your hand, place it on your chest and  act as if you are turning the radio dial, trying to find the right station)

v     If you get the message that you are worthless, turn the dial and change the frequency… Zora Neale Hurston said, “Sometimes, I feel discriminated against, but it does not make me angry. It merely astonishes me. How can any deny themselves the pleasure of my company? It’s beyond me.” (You matter my Sister.)
v     If you get the message that you are insignificant and no one will accept me, turn the dial and change the frequency….I think I hear the words of Malcolm X, “We cannot think of being acceptable to others until we have first proven acceptable to ourselves.”
v     If you get the message that you are incapable of performing a task, turn the dial and change the frequency…. Listen to the words of Jeremiah talking about his conversation with God…God said “Before I shaped you in the womb, I knew all about you.
Before you saw the light of day,
 I had holy plans for you:
A prophet to the nations— that’s what I had in mind for you. ”I’ll tell you where to go and you’ll go there.
I’ll tell you what to say and you’ll say it.
 Don’t be afraid of a soul.
I’ll be right there, looking after you… I’ve given you a job to do 
among nations and governments…Your job is to pull up and tear down,
take apart and demolish. 
And then start over,
building and planting.”

My sister you can start over TODAY! TODAY! TODAY! TODAY!

So ladies now that we know how to Live and we know how to Love ourselves, now we must Learn.  
Learn what, you ask?
I want to leave you with a few quotes that I believe will help us all as we are on our journey.

Mahatma Gandhi said
Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.

Live with purpose and intention, living your life as if this were your last chance. Then love yourself enough to keep learning.  In everything that we do, we must make it our life’s mission to keep growing and developing and maybe even reinventing ourselves.  If you don’t like something about yourself…it’s Okay…. go ahead and change the frequency.

Benjamin Franklin
Tell me and I forget. Teach me and I remember. Involve me and I learn.
Take someone on the journey with you.  Maybe it’s time for you to be a mentor.. As you are growing, invite a sister- friend along with you in the process.  You’ll be amazed how much you can glean from one another.  Involve someone else who will support you along the journey.

Last but not least.  In fact, I think this has become my favorite quote.

Friedrich Nietzsche said
He who would learn to fly one day must first learn to stand and walk and run and climb and dance; one cannot fly into flying.

Simply stated nothing happens overnight…we all have to start at some point.  We might be at different stages of the process, but we’re all just trying to fly. 

 If you’ve ever flown in an airplane, you’ll realize that every passenger must go through some of the same things initially.  
Ø We all have to go to the TSI agents and show our ID and boarding pass.
Ø Whether you take your luggage on the plane or choose to have them stowed underneath, we all have to place whatever items we have in our possession on the conveyer belt to be scanned and then walk through the body scanners ourselves.
Ø But once we get past that point, everything changes; people begin scurrying in different directions because now they have to find the correct departure gate.

·    Maybe your gate is a little farther to walk than your sisters, but guess what...you’re still in the airport. 
·    Maybe you arrived early and you have to sit in the waiting area until the flight is ready…it doesn’t matter……… you’ll get on the plane, at your appointed time.
·    Maybe you are running late and barely made it to the gate…you’re out of breath, you hit a couple of people in the head with your bag as you are trying to take your seat, but it really doesn’t matter how you got there.........because you made it and you’re now seated on the plane.
Each of us has our own destination that God has planned for us, but just realize that your flight might take a little longer than someone else’s.  But no matter how long it takes; we will eventually land at our final destination.

So hear me ladies, be willing to learn from your sisters journey.  Don’t be the one who didn’t pack a travel bag the night before, overslept the morning of, arrived to the airport late, without an ID and boarding pass and now has an attitude with everyone, as if everyone else  is wrong. Don’t get left behind due to lack of preparation!

Ladies,
Live. Love. Learn
3 simple words…but they’re jam-packed with PURPOSE, POTENTIAL, PROMISE and POWER.

1. Live as if today were your last.
2. Love yourself first.
3. Learn the joys of standing, walking, dancing and running, because if you can appreciate each of those stages eventually you will fly.


Follow me on twitter: @soul2soledoctor
#livelovelearn2014