Last night I cried...

It's funny how God will sometimes use the craziest thing to get our attention.

About a week ago, Daddy and I were talking and he mentioned that his apartment building was changing phone, cable and internet service.  His phone carrier would no longer be needed, because he was being upgraded.  He was excited because he would now have free internet, although he has no computer, nor does he know what WiFi is all about.  (This man doesn't even text, so his interest in technology is quite amusing to me.) 

Last night, we had a great choir rehearsal.  We sang, we laughed and we praised.  I taught two of Mommy's original songs, "So Glad He Came" and "Happy Birthday Jesus".   Choir rehearsal was light-hearted and even comical at times.   Whenever we meet,  we always close out the rehearsal with prayer requests and praise reports.  It's an opportunity for us to hear each others hearts and offer support and encouragement.  Many expressed their loss for loved ones and how difficult it was during this time.

As we move closer to Christmas, we recognize that people feel death even more than they did in the summer or any other time of the year.  The Thanksgiving/Christmas/ New Year season is a time where you think about family and reminisce over childhood memories.  It seems that this time of year brings out the best, while oftentimes causing silent anguish in the life of those missing loved ones.  I know that God has given me a heart for people, so I can commiserate with you while at the same time help you move past that pain.  Kinda like speaking to your pain and causing you to think more positive thoughts.  Well last night, I think the Lord pricked my heart, just a little, so I could really feel what others might be feeling.

When I returned home from choir rehearsal, I decided to call Daddy.  He has a cold, so I've been calling EVERY day to make sure he's drinking enough water and getting proper rest. (The Lord has definitely blessed him at 85 years young.)  I called his house phone and was utterly confused!!!  I sat there in a daze before dialing his cell phone.  It took me a couple of minutes to process the information, then it hit me like a punch in the gut.  Daddy's new phone service changed my life forever. She was gone!  After 4 years, 9 months and 2 days, Mommy's voice was gone in an instant.  What you don't know is....my mother's voice was still on my parent's home answering machine.  I remember when she passed in 2013, some of my family members would never call Daddy on the house phone because it was too painful to hear her voice.  Not me!  That was my tiny little pleasure; my slice of heaven; my connection to Mommy.  Whenever I wanted to talk to her, I'd simply call the house, hear her voice and have a conversation.  We still had that special Mommy-daughter connection that no one else knew about.  It was just me and my Mommy!  I had to quickly pull it together and call Daddy on his cell phone.  We talked and as soon as we hung up, I dialed the house phone again.  Once again, the generic voice of the answering machine continued, "no one is available at (215) blah blah blah - blah blah blah blah"! (Whatever Lady. Ugh!)

I sat on the floor for a minute, just staring into nothingness.  My husband called me into the room for something and as I walked towards him, I began to cry.  All I could do was whisper, "she's gone".  As I began to recount the story, he caught on immediately and nodded " the answering machine".  After taking a shower and getting ready for bed, I was better but extremely quiet.

This morning as I laid in the bed about 3:30 am (this is normal) my mind raced back to all of the conversations in choir rehearsal and on social media about people feeling loss, during especially during this time of year.  God reminded me that I wasn't exempt.  Sometimes it's easy to dismiss someone elses feelings when you don't understand or have not experienced what they've gone through.  Last night was a wake up call to genuinely love people through this time.  Because you feel the loss doesn't mean that you're weak...you're just sad!  So be sad, cry and then thank the Lord for helping you to feel and to remember.  You are not cold-hearted.  The blood is still running warm through your veins and you are still alive because God isn't ready for you yet.  And as Mommy said to me as my family dropped me off at Spelman College, many years ago....."When you get homesick or miss us, don't stay here in a pity part and turn on sad music, you better turn on some gospel music and sing yourself happy". (I've been doing just that for years. Ha! Thanks Mommy.)

God is so neat; because even in your pain, He will give you revelation.  Her voice is gone, but her spirit lives in me.  Her voice is gone, but I can still hear her words of encouragement.  Her voice is gone, but her legacy continues through me. Her voice is gone, but when I lay my hands on someone to pray, I feel her energy (because that's what she did for me).

Well it's time to wake the boys for school, so I must leave you.  I think I'll connect my phone to the living room speaker, turn on my gospel music and DANCE as we prepare for the day.

Last night I cried because I couldn't hear her voice; but today I'll dance because her spirit lives on inside of me.  I am my mother's daughter and I choose to dance!

Now walk it out.......

Birthday blessings

Lord knows that I couldn't celebrate my 46th birthday without celebrating you as well.  God has us on a journey this year!
Please enjoy this video message for you on YouTube.  God gave me a revelation as I was cleaning out my closet on Saturday and I think it's a right now word for all of us.

When you clear the clutter in your closet, you'll be able to walk it out...

Smooches

There's a blessing in your boredom!

I know, I know....it's been a long time!

I guess I'm feeling inspired this morning as I walk on the treadmill at my father's apartment complex.

Honestly, I think it's because I am in Philly visiting Daddy who is 85 years blessed and I don't have all the UNNECESSARY THINGS around me to occupy my time. I'm actually able to sit, think, soul search, Google search because he's still asleep and it's quiet.

I'm not washing clothes, walking the dog, tidying up the living/dining room, cutting the grass, watering plants, etc...  all of which I can usually get done b/w 5-8 am. Ha! #feelsstrangethough

My advice to all of us...

Breathe slowly & deeply whenever you can.
Disconnect yourself from the "norm" periodically.
Enjoy being bored.
Connect with something/someone that makes you smile.
Be still long enough to hear.

Peace out! #morechillingtodo #myheadacheisgone #quiettime

I thought I was just here to visit, love and serve;  but in my stillness I am gaining clarity.

Now walk it out...

When God says to pray.....JUST PRAY

I wanted to talk to you and I needed to do it face to face.

Enjoy the video...

Now walk it out, as we pray!

Just Slow Down Already

For the past two weeks, I have heard God saying to me repeatedly, "SLOW DOWN".

"Slow down??? Lord, don't you know that I've got things to do!" That sounds ridiculous doesn't it?; but don't judge me.  You know you've probably said the same thing at some point.  The world that we live in is moving so quickly.  There are deadlines to be made, community to participate in, phone calls to make, business opportunities to seek after, family to care for, friends to catch up with and soooo much more.  Someone is ALWAYS pulling on us.  You go to the local grocery store just to shop and someone comes down the aisle waxing philospohical. (I was looking for corn, not conversation.)  When you go to one of your child's activities, someone calls on the phone for a deep debate.  You try to take a quick nap, but you can't fall asleep because you didn't silence the FB notifications on your phone.  It's a hot mess!  So much to do, so little time.....but is that really the case?

Who told you couldn't turn your phone off temporarily?  Who said that you shouldn't give a polite wave and save the conversation for another day?

We are so busy trying not to offend others that we have forgotten how to protect ourselves.  You are the greatest commodity, your greatest asset and it's time to protect it.

• You need rest.
• You need time away.
• You need peace and quiet.
• You need an opportunity to sit outside and listen to the birds chirping.
• You need stillness to hear from God.

So if you need it...............it's time to take it!

Slow down and enjoy God's creation. Slow down and love on the people in your home.  Slow down and turn your phone off for a spell.  Slow down and actually follow through at the gym.  Slow down and bask in the afternoon sun.  Slow down and not only talk to God, but be sure to listen to God.

If you're a busy-body, it might be challenging, but it will definitely be worth it.  How do I know?  Because I'M definitely a busy-body, but I'm learning to let go.  (Okay, so I'm up to letting go... I'm a work in progress.)

This is my challenge to you....If you're asked to do something that doesn't edify you and could potentially be draining, just say NO.  Life will not end!  It's time for you to slow down.

Now walk it out...

A fall, a seizure, a laceration and a concussion....BUT GOD!

This is Courtland's testimony.

     Last Monday morning was the 1st day of spring break for the boys.  My husband and I had the trip all planned out.  We would leave OKC @4:30 am heading to Atlanta Ga.   We decided that we'd stop for breakfast at Cracker Barrel in Little Rock; be prepared to eat lunch in Memphis and arrive in Birmingham, AL ready to check into our hotel for the night.  We'd wake up on Tuesday in Birmingham ready to visit the Civil Rights Museum and then drive the final 2 hours to our destination in Atlanta.
     Byron and I graduated from Morehouse and Spelman Colleges, respectively and we were so ready to show the boys our old stomping ground.  They were psyched, we were psyched and the Coleman's were ready to begin a week long driving adventure.  Obviously, the Lord had other plans for us.
     Byron woke up and showered before I woke up.  He was on the other side of the house, in the kitchen, ready for the word to begin loading the car.  It was time to wake the boys up, so we could begin the trip. I went to Courtland's room first and told him to get into the shower.  He jumped up immediately with expectancy and went into the bathroom.  I had gone back into my bathroom, which abuts the bathroom where Courtland has turned on the water in the shower.  I honestly don't know how much time had elapsed before I heard a "thud" and the shower curtain rods falling.  I dropped everything and ran to the bathroom, knowing that something happened but not prepared to see what I saw.
     When I opened the bathroom door, I immediately noticed the missing shower curtain and I expected to see and hear Courtland trying to get up.  However, the scene was quite different.  I saw his legs in the air and his torso was wrapped in the shower curtain, but he was NOT moving.  I screamed his name and reached to pick him up, as I noticed his bloodshot eyes, blazing straight ahead.  I immediately began my blood curdling call for Byron, with instructions to call 911.  As I began unwrapping him from the shower curtain, he went into a tonic-clonic seizure and began convulsing.  By this time, Byron is on the phone with the operator, my other son was an emotional wreck and I was praying.  I was straddled on the side of the tub, attempting to hold his body on the side until the convulsing stopped.  I managed to hear Byron's questions from the 911 operator,  assure Chandler that his little brother would be fine and hear the prayers of my mother coming from my mouth.  Nelda (Mommy) was in that bathroom because I remember hearing her prayers over me since I was a little girl.  I knew to call on the name of Jesus and to begin to proclaim healing and restoration.  The convulsions ended and he laid on the floor unconscious, but breathing.  Shortly afterwards, we heard the firetruck sirens headed to our home.  Medical help was on the way; but the real help was already in that bathroom with us!
     Four strapping firemen walked into our home and I moved out of the way.  They decided to  move my baby out of the bathroom and placed him on his bed, which was directly across the hall. Because he'd fallen on his back, they placed him in a neck brace and put him on the board.  They wanted to make sure that he hadn't injured his spinal column, which could ultimately affect his spinal cord and his ability to move.  After the firemen, then came EMSA and I began relaying the same account of my story.  Of course, this warranted a trip to the hospital, so we headed out to Children's Hospital.  I rode in the front of the ambulance, as Byron and Chandler shut the house down and drove behind us.
Courtland was still in a daze and the EMSA worker said to me, as we were wheeling him in, "I'm concerned that we have not gotten a verbal response from him".  I was baffled that he actually said this out loud to the patient's mother.  Are you serious Sir?  This is something you whisper to another worker, NOT the boys mama.  I rebuked the devil and prayed even louder, as we approached the ER room bay #12.  As the hospital team began to hook him up to their machines, the doctor asked a question and after 25-30 minutes of no verbal response, Courtland said, YES.  He spoke and the EMSA worker looked at me with surprise and joy in his eyes. I simply said, "thank you Lord" and focused again on my child.
    As time progressed, he began to emerge from the fog by talking, while holding my hand.  They rolled him away to get a CT scan.  Results: No sign of tumor or brain bleed.  And he also needed just 3 stitches on his right eyelid.  After about 4 hours, things were back to "normal" and he was being discharged with instructions to follow up with his pediatrician.  We went home and he slept on the couch for the next few hours.  Needless to say, we were at the pediatrician's office by 1 pm that afternoon.  It was there that we talked about possible causes, future tests, neurological follow up and concussion protocol.

WHAT A DAY!

     Needless to say, the Atlanta trip was off but we definitely needed a change of scenery.  We were ALL emotionally and physically drained and the pediatrician thought it would be alright for us to travel; so the next day we drove to Dallas.  For the next few days Courtland was tired, the muscles in his legs pained him when he walked and his mouth hurt; but he was alive and well.  So we popped Aleve, rested, kissed, hugged and prayed a whole lot.  By Thursday,  he was back to himself and not complaining of pain.  His laughter was refreshing!  Thank God for favor....we were able to set all of his doctors appointments for Monday.  EKG, EEG and vision test all scheduled (he mentioned blurry eyes when he got into the shower that Monday morning). 
     So why did I tell you all of this?  I am just amazed at the awesomeness and grace of God.  Our family has learned to trust God completely through this situation.  Although we were disappointed by not being able to travel to Atlanta, we began to think about the dangers that the Lord may have been keeping us from on the highway.  Psalms 91 talks about how God has angels watching over us.  (We definitely had our angels, with eyes laser-focused on us.)  Because I am always concerned about the condition of your soul, I want to encourage to know God for yourself.  My medical knowledge didn't force me into action, because I was looking at MY baby.  It was nothing but the Holy Spirit that allowed me to stay level headed and PRAYERFUL.  That's why I openly pray with the boys daily.  I pray over them, but I also invite them to pray for us from time to time.   In fact, when big brother was frantic I encouraged him to pray.  "You know how to talk to God, so go ahead and pray baby".  Although I never heard him, I know he was pleading with God as he cried for his little brother.  There is power in calling on the name of the Lord, NOT in fear but in Faith.  I believe that this was his first and last seizure, but we're going to do some precautionary things until we get some real answers.  I hope that you never have to experience anything like this, but if you have a relationship with God and converse with Him daily, you will be able to handle it.

Now start praying & praising and walk it out...

The picture of Courtland is from today after church.  Doesn't my baby look great?!  If I hadn't mentioned his ordeal today, no one would have ever noticed any change.  That's just how good God is!  Yes, thumbs up Baby....it's all good!

Remove the Kinks in the Line _Soulful Sunday with Dr. Sharri

Today, I decided to share a vlog (video blog) with you.  I just thought connecting with you via video was important for today's session.  This message is about my trip to the chiropractor and how it changed my life or is changing my life.  It's all apart of this journey!

Once you've completed the video...... Walk it out!